Smoking Cigars Courtesy of Sprunger, and Men in Kilts Playing the Guitar

The smile on our faces is the best example of the time we had. Me and Andy went to the Highland Festival this past Saturday, and if you don't know what it is, it's a Scottish celebration festival. We went with Smokers Club to go vend Cigars and specialty cigarettes without the intention of staying by the table to work, but totally did anyway. Our table was located in the Scotch and Wine tent, and towards the end of the night we SLAYED! We sold so many cigars at gross, festival-inflation prices. Nobody carded me either, so I was tasting wine, doing jello shots, and drinking rum the entire day and night. We worked from 4-12:30 (for the festival... not to mention our 9-3 shift at Smokers Club that morning), and I smoked a lot of cigars and more than a handful of bowls of Michigan Street (that's an aromatic pipe tobacco) in my pipe. I killed the flask of rum I brought too... so all the sin that went into my body that night, coupled with the fact that I hadn't eaten more than a muffin for breakfast and a bukkit-o-fries had me feeling pretty sick at the end of the night.

We actually got to sneak away for a bit when we got there and went to check out some of the vendors. There were swords for less than $50, kilts for sale, and all types of Scottish vends. I was smoking a cigar whilst, and only one guy mentioned 'how rude' it was. I wasn't bothered by his comment, but the fact that he touched me when he said it, and it wasn't a friendly touch. I promptly told him to 'go inside, then'. He then dragged his son out of the sword tent while looking like a complete asshole. It wasn't like I was blowing smoke in his face either. Oh well.

But all in all I had a really good time. We were situated in the alcoholic mainstage area where there was a stage for a band to play and a bunch of drunk folks astumblin', and mainly all of them were really good people, so it was fun to sell to them with bagpipes and guitar in the background the whole night. The people who worked the winery were really cool, too. They ended up (and this wasn't their policy... but they did anyway) selling Deb and Andy some bottles of wine after much tasting and conversing. Deb and Doug were awesome company. We all were able to get away from the Club and just have a great time and awesome conversation. And hey! I even found a few glass ashtrays to take home as souveniers.

I'd do it again, for sure.

Looking Up and The Promise of A Good Time!

Things may be actually turning around for me. Just when I was about to go and re-apply, I got the letter I was waiting for from the Department of Human Services for my Bridge Card. In the wake of my recent Sams Club Membership, it could be good. 

Tomorrow Me and Andy are going to the Highland Festival at Alma College after work. It's a Scottish Festival with traditional food and festivities. Apparently it's a big deal, they have all kinds of professional and serious Scotsmen attend. One of the main reasons I'm going is that Smokers Club is going to have a smoke tent to vend cigars and cigarettes, but i'm also going because it's one hell of an excuse to get out of the house. 

I'll post pictures!

Best Way to Waste Printer Ink and Make Your Living Space Look Good

I was recommended a website from a friend, and it's really turned out to be wholeheartedly worthwile. It's called http://www.blockposters.com/ and there are nearly endless possibilities for what you can do with it. Granted, you can only upload photos to it that are under 1MB, but if you have about an hour to plan it out and a good printer, it proves to be a great touch to any apartment or dorm or whathaveyou. Check out their 'gallery' for ideas! 

You've gotta love well wishing, or, friends who make 'promises' that don't happen, or--Why I finally understand old people who look out their windows.

Don't get me wrong, I love my friends, but, maybe it just seems to me, and perhaps this is selfish, that I go visiting far more often than I am visited. And every time I go to leave I always get the token, "Aw, yeah man, I'm going to come up and visit real soon" deal, and it just never seems to happen. Maybe that's just the way that friends from home want to scoot me out the door quicker, or they are just scared they will come off the wrong way or something, but since college I've only found a handful (this handful being like, 2 or 3 people) that actually follow through with what they say they are going to do, and don't bullshit things. For that, I'm appreciative, but I don't mean to discredit the more than 10 friends and family that just never seem to follow through with shit, because they're good folk. Honest. And hell, maybe it just happens that legit plans fall through at the last minute for everyone, but god damn it happens a lot--- and in the week where I finally understand why old people sit out on their front lawns and look at traffic or are creepy and just look out their windows at passers or small animals because there isn't ANYTHING on tv worth watching or anyone to talk to, that I really wish I had a visitor. I got a lot of stuff done this week, yet there was a lot of time, like now, that I'm not doing shit, and would love to have someone to chill with. 

Every so often someone enters the store and just doesn't leave, and continues talking much longer after they get what they want about their personal life that you don't care about, and when they leave, you look at any nearby coworker who was subjected to such dead-endery and give them a look that can only be explained as a "well... okay" by opening your eyes wider, raising your eyebrows, and giving a thoughtful "wtf" frown. I finally understand these people, who browse about in a store much longer than needed so they might be around something interesting to make their day feel worthwhile when they lay down to bed at night. 

I suppose the moral of this story is that I would like to put myself out there far enough to meet some quality people who are willing to put forth enough effort and time in order to necessitate a small refund in the form of a good time. ---i.e., people who can pry away from their lives just long enough to do something as petty as hanging out with someone who actually cares. ---i.e., someone who gives a fuck.

My feet hurt

I walked everywhere today. The only redeeming fact about walking 2 and a half hours home is well, a few things. I signed up for a bridge card, I bought "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" with an extra disc full of special features, and I got a bike that needs a touch of air in the tires. Otherwise, it was a lot of walking and sunlight. But by FAR the most wonderful thing about the day would by any other means be the most overlooked. It was dinner. I hadn't eaten anything solid all day, and this simple fried hamburger and onions was absolutely delicious. The biggest downfall about living in the apartment is that I can't go home for the summer due to lack of car, getting around is tough, and this whole week the most company I have is Food Network (not that i'm complaining, but Guy Fieri can't talk back). I'll manage though. I see it as some time off from the world until the work I am doing sets itself up. And besides, I get to watch good movies all week. 

This Thursday

I officially move into my apartment and start life independently. I'll be living in Mt. Pleasant all summer, and it has promise to be great. I'll continue working at Smokers Club as well. I'm very excited. We've got three guys living in a 5 room townhouse. My goal for the summer is to save up enough money to pay off my apartment and enough money to buy a car and put it on the road. Here's to everything going well! 

I Want To Smoke Myself

http://altinokpipe.com/portraitpipe.asp

Check the link. For a MERE $400, I could smoke tobacco out of my likeness! Pretty badass..

The Zombie Apocalypse and Eventual Capture by Mexican Nationalists

What a dreary Monday. Yet, so typical. One would expect rain on a Monday..

Anyhow, I've felt awfully hatemongerish today and I don't know why. Maybe it was the dream I had:

The dream started with me being handed 3 different things: a large gun (either shotgun or automatic), a handgun, and a knife of some kind. I asked why I was being handed these things, and the answer came from nobody and nowhere at the same time: it was the Zombie Apocalypse. Everyone was killing each other out of mistrust too, so it was every man for himself. The weird part is, if you got killed, you respawned. I was running around in first person, killing everyone threatening to kill me, because the death experienced I could actually feel in my sleep; so every time I was stabbed to death, I felt it. 

After a while of senseless killing, I used my words. I explained how pointless this all was and a few seemed to agree. So myself and the small band I had gathered closed ourselves off in what seemed to be a corporate office in the mexican jungle. There were two doors in this room, and a couple windows. The office was set across from another building as well, but it appeared to be abandoned and completely broken down, posing no threat. The doors in the room were locked and blocked off by things, but the people on the outside learned that we were in the room, and started shooting down the doors. We had eventually killed them off when they broke through, and everything seemed quiet. 

Then i'm looking at a guy standing near the window, and then--- an arrow grows out of his chest! He falls in dismay to the ground. One, two, three more are killed, until it's just me and this other girl in the room. We look at each other, and she books out the door. I follow her, and before we know it, we're outside in the sun, and then running through thick undergrowth for what seemed an eternity. When she finally stopped running, I collapsed from exhaustion. 

There was a crashing through the undergrowth, and I was dragged a short distance to a broken down barn near a river. It was disgusting. There was garbage and children everywhere. I was brought into the barn and thrust into a chair. They were screaming at me in Spanish, and pointing guns in my face. They asked what I was doing in Mexico and asked me why I should live. Even in the dream, I was consciously thankful that I took 4 years of Spanish in High School. I responded in broken words that I should live because I could cook and clean and tend to the children. They backed down, and days passed. I grew fond of the children. A week passed. I cleaned up the camp. I learned they were Mexican Nationalists, planning to overthrow the government for the Zombie Virus outbreak. 

Then, I woke up.

Just Another Day.

As the workday finally comes to a close, I put out my cigar and start to make my way home. I'm heading out a little later than I want to (40 minutes after close), but I'm okay with it; the company of Deb and Doug was too much just to walk away from. Doug has the greatest stories. As I start heading down Michigan Street, I can only picture myself from behind as I walk into the sunset. 14 blocks to go. 'Dramamine' by Modest Mouse comes on my Ipod. I get a text. It's Andy. The realization that we're having ribs for dinner tonight sets in as I read his message, "Where are you? I'm almost done grilling." Shit.. it's going to take a half hour to walk home, and i'm going to miss delicious spare ribs with the Sweet Baby Rays barbeque sauce that I like so much. I text him back, and take off my sandals; they only slow me down. The pavement is still warm from the cloudless day, and even though the pavement hurts my feet, the warmth feels great. I start to jog, I don't want to be late. I turn onto Fancher, and keep a nice rythym. Families are still out in their yards, oblivious to the drunken masses only a few blocks over. I cut a corner. The soft grass is much better than the now-cool pavement. 12 blocks to go. I start running just off the sidewalk. The impact is too much on my heels. 

As I approach High Street (M-20), the traffic is suprisingly light for how many people came out of their caves to enjoy the weather. I cross with relative ease. I zigzag my way through the maze of suburbia, and enter the college housing. Just ahead there is a convenience store I never bothered to go into, despite the fact I've lived just a stone's throw away for 2 years. I throw my sandals on, and approach. A friendly welcome found my way to the cooler. I grab 2 liters of Diet Coke. $4.13 at the counter. The man working is a little older than me, and we make small talk. "Throw it on the card." We wish each other well. 7 blocks to go. 

They seemed to pass in a blur. The sun has now set, and it's dark. I walk oblivious to the partying going on around me. Oblivious to the frat boy already passed out in a bush to the right. Oblivious the the girls walking by with the mini-skirts that would impress their fathers. Oblivious to the discarded cans and the 'all-too-epic' wreckage. The only thing on my mind is the music pumping through my ears, and the longing to get back to the dorm for a nice dinner (for once). 1 more block.

I cross the street to find my RHD and her husband Gabe on the front steps. They ask me what a moose sounds like. Their son looks up at me. I give it my best. They laugh, I continue. I make my way to the back lobby, and through the doors to where the grill is. Nobody is there, but I open the top of the grill anyway. The coals are still hot, and I can see the BBQ despite the darkness. I make my way upstairs, and everyone is waiting for me. 

Just another day.

Today I Was Damned To Hell.

The 'beloved' Soulwinners are back on what seems the best two days that this year has had to offer. The past 2+ years they have gathered, preaching the Old Testament and telling people they're going to hell for not heeding the almighty God. People who supported gays--damned to hell. People who had sex before marriage-- damned to hell. People who do not attend church every Sunday-- damned to hell. The lady even damned CMU to hell after somebody yelled that CMU supports gays and lesbians. I believe, at one point, the Soulwinners told people that everyone who has died from a disease or in a national disaster were sinners and are in hell. "Only those who aren't Christlike obtain diseases." (according to the all knowledgeable God-talker-with-ers) One kid piped up and asked about his little cousin who was 2 and was diagnosed with cancer recently. The lady replied simply, "Tell her to repent." She's 2!! How does somebody who is 2 repent for their sins? The crowd of gawkers was in an uproar. At one point, the people gathered so closely and the debate so hot that they pushed their way out of the crowd and left because it was getting out of control. Every year they come, I get mad. Who are they to damn me to hell without even knowing me? I mean, I'm sure I've already paved a nice path downwards, but why go about damning people to hell. Why. I've never known anything that separates people as greatly as Religion does. 

Is it just me, or is Religion absoultely insufferable?

Why Diets and Holidays Aren't Friends.

It seems every time I try to go on a diet, on comes another holiday. It started when I got to school, but then there was Halloween. After gorging on candy, I thought it would be good to start then; but no, there was Thanksgiving, and my Dad got a Tur-duck-hen. After that it was too cold, and good old Xmas came, and I gorged on Xmas cookies (bad idea). Now that it's warmer, I thought working out would be great, but now there's freakin' Easter--and that candy lasts FOREVER. On top of it all, I have black lung like crazy, and little motivation to actually go to the gym. In fact, that bag of Butterfinger eggs look pretty damn good right now. 

The Christening

Thus starts a new chapter in my life: the blog.. and I don't know if any of my blatherings will have interest for anyone, to be fair. I plan to talk about myself, tell stories that don't go anywhere, talk about deeper issues and question them, and occasionally give one-sided opinions about movies. Now, keep in mind much of it will be parodical and ironic, so don't get all pissed off at what I write-- because Jesus knows you will at some point, but hey; there will be occasional laughs. And if you don't like it, keep in mind you don't HAVE to read what I have to say. In fact--no. Just go! Gerroutoferre! Captain "Piss-Pants McGee"--- Mister, "Oh, My Nose Is Too High In The Air To Level With You Or Ever See A Different Side Of The Issue Because I Keep My Shit In A Bowl To Keep The Air In The Room Fresh" guy. So you just off and skedaddle with all of your homework and better things to do. I'll try to write tomorrow.

Dick.